Most of us have been there- some of us more than once, at that place along the path of life where we stop to assess what we’re doing, where we’re going, and whether or not we’re happy. The crossroads, it’s called, and I hear it’s as exciting as it is scary, although the latter is more common in my experience.
We crane our heads from one side to the next, straining our eyes in a futile attempt to see what danger or excitement lies down which road, before choosing the one to venture. And, like a child shaking their presents on Christmas Eve, we wonder, what gift is ahead of us. Will it be an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle? Or will it be a shot in the eye?
Life for me lately has been one big emotional roller coaster- reflected, quite obviously, in my blog entries where I feel safe enough to be real with my thoughts and feelings. And, while I love a good roller coaster, my emotions are riding the topsy-turvy tracks much faster than I’d prefer to go- running happy, sad, scared, resolved, guilty, hurt, terrified, excited, devastated, angry, nervous, thrilled, and more nearly off the tracks at a hundred miles an hour.
Woah, Nellie, slow the EFF down.
Somedays I’m able to cope with my challenges better than others. I, along with 9% of Americans according to the CDC, struggle with mild-to-moderate depression. At times, my depression is brought on by life circumstances, and at others, my life struggles are brought about by my depression. And, as often as either, I’m a happy-go-lucky person, with much to be joyful about, and more to be grateful for.
Today, add a bunch of tremendously difficult life struggles to the mix- some that require me to make life-altering choices, and here I am: in the Pit of Despair, waiting on my torture or my rescue, whichever may arrive first.
Eventually, I’ll crawl out of this ditch- life experience has taught me that I’ll rise from the foxhole at some point – once the gunfire slows, no doubt.
But for now, like Joe Dirt, I’ll keep on keepin’ on. Because that’s what we do: keep on going.
And, I’ll remember that up, down, up, down, up, down, up, down, it will get hard, ’cause life’s like a jumprope.